Choices.

As cliche as it sounds, everything is made up of choices that we make every moment. Choices can be about trivial things, like how we can choose between cereal and toast for breakfast, and also heavy choices must be made, matter of life and death, crossing the point of no return.

And I passed that point of no return. Now I am headed for a really unhappy ending or really unlikely happy ending. To which one I would go, I have no idea.

I try to tell myself that there's grim hope that the ending may not be so to the extreme; perhaps there's a 'middle path' that I may be able to follow, choose. But I know more than enough by now that this middle path is virtually nothing but an imaginary choice that we like to think that we have.

Thus the fact that I do not like to take up responsibility especially when it comes to love, the reason is quite obvious; as cowardly as it may sound, I am afraid of being hurt. That is the same with other things; the position of responsibility and power is attractive; but the higher you go, the longer the fall. So this time i decided to keep out of it, to stay off it until i'm sure.

To be honest I'm not sure whether I have given this enough thought.

But one thing's definitely sure though:

I am now committed to choice, and I'm going to uphold that. If it hurts, and at the end of all this I can already foresee a broken pieces of hearts on the floor, then so be it.

I just wish the times that we have left before are worth all that pain. Only if we had more time.